I re-kindled my love of camping in 1993. I was in the Oklahoma Army National Guard, and we were doing our annual two-week training/summer camp. That year, instead of setting up the usual big-ass tent that could house my entire platoon with our cots and all of our gear, we bivouacked, which is basically forced camping. One evening, I was sitting on the ground outside of my pup tent and reading a book, and thought that some coffee would be good. I looked through some MRE packets and found packets of instant coffee, sugar, and cocoa mix. Meal, Ready-to-Eat (MRE) packets are widely despised except by me and 3 other people in the world. When some of my army friends walked by my tent, and asked what the hell I was doing, I would tell them. They were all skeptical of the idea of an MRE mocha, but after one sip, they were hooked. By the time the sun had gone down, there were 4 or 5 people sitting around my canteen stove, drinking coffee and talking about whatever. It was great.

A couple of friends and I liked it so much, we went camping a few weeks later, and that was it. No army uniforms, roomier tents, and a huge crackling fire. No phones, no work, no noise. (To this day, whenever I claim a campsite for the weekend, I feel like a big weight has been taken off my shoulders. Cindy feels it, too.)

Anyway, we would go on small hikes during these camping weekends, and we started thinking about doing longer ones. When you start thinking about stuff like that, sooner or later you hear about the Appalachian Trail, a 2,200-mile footpath from Georgia to Maine. The AT is like Route 66 for hikers. It would take lots of time and money to hike the AT, and if I ever had plenty of one, I had none of the other. So, I put it off.

It’s been 15 years since I first started talking about hiking the Appalachian Trail. I still haven’t done it, but I still talk about it a dozen times a year. A few years ago, I read A Walk in the Woods: Rediscovering America on the Appalachian Trail by Bill Bryson, and I really wanted to hit the AT…which is crazy because, if you’ve read the book, any sane person would have the exactly opposite notion.

Case in point: A couple of months ago, Cindy and I were sitting on the couch, and she was reading Bryson’s book, and after reading a section about bear attacks and missing hikers, she looked up and said, “And you want to do this?!” and proceeds to read aloud the section about bear attacks and missing hikers. “Are you crazy?”

“Well, I don’t want to do that part,” I said.

I still don’t have the time or money to thru-hike the AT, but that’s okay. I don’t really have the body for it anymore for it either. I think I would be satisfied with just spending 4 to 7 days on the trail, a section of it that’s not too harsh. I want to enjoy the experience, after all.

It’s on the list for 2010.

So, I have already taken steps toward making that a reality this year. I’ll keep you updated when everything starts coming together. I can’t say much right now because I have two friends that are going and it all requires some co-ordination.

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A couple of weeks ago, Cindy and I saw The Da Vinci Code. Like the book, the movie is making oodles of money, and upsetting a lot of people of faith, including religiosity salesman Ted Baehr who calls it “Dan Brown’s hate-filled, fictitious attack on Jesus Christ, Christianity, the Bible, Christians and history” (because, you know, it’s not like the Church has ever meddled with history for its own ends or anything). Just do a Google search and you’ll see that a lot of people are protesting The Da Vinci Code. If people really, truly wanted to do some good in the world, they should have been out there protesting Big Mamma’s House 2.

On a side note, the phrase “fictitious attack on Jesus Christ” seems a little odd to me. Isn’t a “fictitious attack” an attack that never happened? Then again, it’s the right phrase in the sense that Crispies are imagining that Dan Brown is attacking them.

I’m with Bob Higgins, who has a nice little piece about Baehr and The Da Vinci Code over at Political Cortex. He says, “What is so frightening to these folks about a work of fiction is a mystery to me unless they fear fiction because they have always been afraid that they have based their entire lives on a work of fiction. I just don’t know.”

Well, neither do I, Bob. Neither do I.

Or so I thought.

Then I realized that The Da Vinci Code is not just a bunch of made up stuff, but filled with many factual details. For example, did you know there really was a Council of Nicea? Okay, maybe you did. But what about Templar Knights? Yeah, I know, too easy. But did you know there really is a place called Paris, France? Or that there is an actual painting called the Mona Lisa by a guy named Leonardo da Vinci?

I began looking through some other books I have on the shelf, trying to find other instances where writers have used real places and events in a not-real way. Using the Internets, I finally found something. Through extensive research, I discovered that dinosaurs did, at one point in time, rule the earth. I also learned that both DNA and Costa Rica do exist. However, I was very disappointed (and disillusioned) when I found out that Jurassic Park was just a made-up place, even though Costa Rica is real.

Dammit! How can it be legal for writers — especially fiction writers — to fuck with our minds like that? Mixing fact and fiction? What the hell’s up with that?

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It almost slipped by without me noticing it, but this is Banned Books Week (September 24?October 1).

My favorite book, Catch-22 by Joseph Heller, hasn’t been on the list for decades, but is was…

Banned in Strongsville, Ohio (1972), but school board’s action was overturned in 1976 by a U.S. District Court in Minarcini v. Strongville City School District, 541 F 2d 577 (6th Cir. 1976). Challenged at the Dallas, Tex. Independent School District high school libraries (1974); in Snoqualmie Wash. (1979) because of several references to women as “whores.”

The most ironic act of censorship has to go to Venada Middle School in Irvine, California. In 1992…

Students received copies of [Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury] with scores of words – mostly “hells” and “damns” – blacked out. The novel is about book-burning and censorship. After receiving complaints from parents and being contacted by reporters, school officials said the censored copies would no longer be used.

Check out the list of the 100 Most Frequently Challenged Books of 1990?2001, and prepare to do some head-shaking.

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Tagged by Ninjanun.

1. Number of books I have owned: It’s had to have been over 1000. At one point, I needed one of those self-storage units to put then in. Because I’m kind of a slow reader, I probably read 1 book for every 10 that I buy. I wound up selling or giving away the books, and used the money to buy stuff for my dorm room. (This was in ’94.)

2. Last book I bought: Bird by Bird : Some Instructions on Writing and Life by Anne Lamott

3. Last book I completed: The Tipping Point: How Little Things Can Make a Big Difference by Malcolm Gladwell

4. Some books that mean a lot to me:

1. Catch 22 by Joseph Heller

2. The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
3. Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury
4. Animal Farm by George Orwell
5. Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott

4b. What are you currently reading? Freethinkers: A History of American Secularism by Susan Jacoby

5. Which 5 bloggers are you passing this onto? I’m not. If they want it, they can come and get it.

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I just finished reading Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life by Anne Lamott. Her insights and reflections on the highs and lows of the writing life are inspiring…or a kick in the crotch, if you thought it was going to be “that easy”.

I decided to check it out after reading this post on 43 Folders, which nailed one of my biggest problems: being my own worse critic.

After years of knowing about this book, and not giving it much thought, I found it strange that I was now seeking it out. The first copy of Bird by Bird I saw was on Shelley‘s desk in 2000. It was one of those late nights just before the semester was to start, and Tiffany and I were in our office pushing furniture around, organizing our desks, dusting shelves, hanging pictures, sweeping, and getting our areas ready for us to live in for the next 4 months.

At some point, I needed something to keep a poster on the wall, a tack or some tape or something, and since Shelley was the only one who already had her space established, I looked on her desk for these items. That’s when I noticed her copy of Bird by Bird. I picked it up, and thought What the hell is this? The cover read “Some Instructions on Writing and Life.” Okay then.

I remember asking Tiffany, “What do you think birds have to do with writing?” She didn’t know. “Knowing Shelley, it probably has something to do with teaching English and nesting. Those are things she’s into, right? Teaching English and nesting?”

We went back to making our own nests, but I never forgot the book because, seriously, what the hell did birds have to do with writing?

Well, now I know.

If you’ve ever thought about writing — or giving it up — you might want to pick up a copy of Bird by Bird. I’m sure you’ll find something in there that’s useful. Or, if you want, you can read some of Anne Lamott’s stuff on Salon.

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