All Entries in the "Writing" Category
Deeper Motive
As many of you know, I have a bazillion projects that I never quite get around to…but this is changing.
My new site, Deeper Motive will be the place where you can track my progress on whatever project — creative or otherwise — I’m working on. I see it as a place to explore my own creative process, share my thoughts about engaging in creative work, and talk about whatever goal-setting, self-improvement thing I’m struggling with. I know I could post this stuff here on my personal blog, but I also know I’m not the only one that struggles with trying to make time, and find the courage, to work on creative projects. Not everyone wants to know what I did over the weekend in Tulsa, or where Cindy and I ate last night. So, I thought it would be better to have a separate place that focused on being creative and productive.
In keeping with the Kaizen philosophy, I’ll be adding pages, pictures, posts, podcasts, and design elements to the site over the next couple of weeks.
I’ll post the first entry on July 1, 2009.
I hope you come over and check it out.
Give Yourself One Hour A Day…Or, At Least, 60 Minutes
Last month, Todd and I ran across this article (via Consumerist) about how Charlie Munger, the Vice-Chairman of Warren Buffett’s investment company Berkshire Hathaway, used to set aside one hour each day to work on personal side-projects for himself. I like this idea for a couple of reasons:
- One hour is about all the time I can spend on a project right now.
- It’s such a small amount of time that the pressure of producing something “epic” is kept at bay.
Over time, these little actions will yield big results. It’s not a new idea, I know. But it’s easy for me to get caught up in a mental gumption trap, believing that I shouldn’t or can’t start something right now because I don’t have the time to give it the attention I feel it deserves or needs. Of course, that is complete and utter bullshit.
Over the past week, I’ve been trying to keep this in mind, working on various side projects I’ve intended to get around to someday. Not surprisingly, at the end of each hour, it’s satisfying to have been able to work on something that’s been sitting around in my head for weeks, months, and years.
After doing this for just one week, a couple of things become obvious:
- I still watch too much television.
- I don’t get enough sleep.
And these two things greatly influence how well I do other things throughout the day. I need to fix that.
As the article asks
“…if you aren’t satisfied with your current situation, why not work for yourself an hour each day? Instead of just idle dreaming, set aside specific time for action. Perhaps the key is small chunks of time, but at regular intervals.”
How very Kaizen. How very Bird by Bird.
At the end of the month, I’ll have a better idea of which projects I’m actually enjoying spending time on, and which ones I’m better off ditching.
Remember to make a note not to forget
First Note in the New Notebook: What you write must exist in two places or it doesn’t really exist (which must also be the reason we have doppelgangers).
A few weeks ago, I was talking to Amy about my recent layoff scare, and how it scared me enough to consider doing something drastic, like trying to make a living doing something I actually like doing for change. But now that I had survived the layoffs, I was scared I might let myself slip back into accepting predictable drudgery. I didn’t want that to happen. After all, my job isn’t going to last forever, and I would eventually have to face the same hopes and fears. All of this has happened before and all of it will happen again. I need to listen to this urge this time. I could start with a small writing project, maybe a fortune cookie fortune, or a short story. A few seconds after I tossed out an idea for a story, I said, “I should probably start writing these down. There’s no telling how many ideas get lost forever because I never write them down. I think I’ll remember them but I never do.”
“Do it. Write it down.”
“Nah, you write it down.” And she did. It was pure laziness on my part. I had a notebook with me. I had a pen. But I was in the middle of drinking coffee, and my notebook was all the way in my back pocket. (Note to self: Would use notebooks more if I could keep them in a girl’s back pocket.)
A couple of hours later, she left and we both forgot that I needed that note.
The next day at work, I thought about that forgotten note, and did something simple and out-of-character: I wrote that fuckin’ idea down. I didn’t care how stupid it was. And then, I told Todd that I’m going to do a little experiment: I’m going to write down every idea I have for a week to see what I’m losing. For some people, this is a habit, but not for me. I caught myself a few times thinking that I’ll just remember it.
After a week, I had 8 ideas. Okay, I thought, this is worth doing. I’m probably losing a few hundred ideas a year by not doing it.
Then, a couple of days ago. Cindy was putting clothes away, and started laughing. She called me into the bedroom, and held out a white-and-orange wad of wet paper. Of course, the one time I actually use my notebook for something more than grocery lists and errands, I’d leave the damn thing to be washed. Luckily, I had told Todd the ideas, so I do have a back-up…of sorts…this time.
Shift
I had a little bit of a layoff scare a few weeks ago, but I survived…for now. About a month ago, my part-time job disappeared, so the idea of losing my “real” job (the one with the bigger paycheck and the great health insurance) had me a little freaked out. Not only would we not be able to pay bills, but finding another job quickly would be more than a little difficult given the current job market. It hasn’t been the greatest lately. You might have heard something about it.
During the week of the layoffs, I had an insanely crazy thought: Maybe I should start seriously considering trying to earn a living writing.
It’s insanely crazy because who the hell thinks like that? It’s not like I’ve ever made money writing anything before. I have never had anything published! I have nothing to show anybody. And, even if I did somehow manage to sell something, it would probably be a while before I saw any money from the sale. There’s just so many things wrong about thinking of “writing” as your Oh Shit!-I-Need-Money-NOW! plan.
So, here’s why having that thought bothers me. I’ve wanted to be a writer since high school, but have always lacked the will and discipline to act on that desire. Like any other creative-types, I have battled demons of self-doubt and lost again and again. The simple answer to why I keep repressing my creative side is fear: I won’t be good. People will think I’m stupid. I don’t have anything worth saying, etc. You know all the fears. It’s been much easier to just get a mindless job, nothing I would dare make a soul-crushing career out of, but something that allows me to keep my mind wandering, entertaining myself.
If mindless work has been my way of avoiding the fear of creating something and letting the world see it, then why, when faced with what seemed like the inevitable loss of that mindless work, would I not immediately think I should find another mindless job? Why would my strongest reaction be to start writing…something, anything?
Not Swallowed In The Sea
For my three readers that stop by on a quasi-semi-regular basis, you’re probably stunned to see a new post here. It’s nice to be surprised every once in a while, isn’t it?
The thing is that writing has been on my mind lately, and I’ve been pondering and cobbling together bits of a story that will eventually become a full-fledged novel. I haven’t written fiction in a long time, and I’m mentally stiff and creatively out of shape. What I wrote this weekend took way more effort than I expected. It was the creative equivalent of trying to eat a candy apple.
They say the more you write, the better you get, but I wouldn’t know because I’m always restarting from square one. One of the reasons I started a blog was so I would stay in the practice of writing something — anything — no matter how little, on a regular basis. Even if I wasn’t working on anything else, I could mentally shadow box here. Obviously, I made the mistake of neglecting this space. Then again, maybe I needed to be away from it for while, so I could miss it, and get to that point where I wanted to be back here, you know.
Well, for better or worse, I’m back.
